Leonardo Da Assistant

If I could pick either Shakespeare, Einstein, Leonardo Da Vinci, Socrates, Steve Jobs, or B. Franklin to be my personal assistant for a week, I'd choose Da Vinci. He would teach me his painting skills and give me some tips to work on being a better painter. I'd basically just make him be my painting buddy and ask him to paint me some stuff and sign it so I could sell it on EBay or something. By doing this, I'd be able to pay him to be my assistant, or painting buddy, for longer. We'd paint many pictures together and be famous together with our work in museums. He'd be the best assistant ever, and never have to do anything he doesn't like doing. 

The Mythical IPhone

A regular magical IPhone would come with special apps with even more just waiting to download. The first app would be a unicorn tracking app. As implied by the name, the app would tracker unicorns. NOTE: If you don't believe in the secret existence of unicorns, you may not be allowed to purchase this phone. 

 The second app would be an app called "The Food Truck." This app would allow you to think up any type of food and have the food come out of a slot at the bottom of the phone in seconds for you. The food would be, of course, edible and possess a great taste. 

The third app would be called "SimiSimSim," which would be similar to the currently existing app "SimSimi" except SimiSimSim would scan your finger as you open the app and determine what mood you are in. Based on the scanning, SimiSimSim would talk to you about any problems you are having, or maybe how amazing your day went. SimiSimSim would respond and talk to you, almost as an actual friend would. 

The last app on my mythical IPhone would be a gaming app, much like a fictional game made up in the well-known anime, Sword Art Online. When you open the app, you are instantly sucked into the game and begin your journey. The differences between Sword Art Online and this app are that you can design your own avatar based off of your real life self and that you don't need to purchase Nerve Gear seperately. Instead, for one a few dollars more, you can recieve a Nerve Gear headset with the phone. You can enjoy as much SAO, and other MMO games, as you want. 

An Almost-Blind Date

I pull in a blindfolded Karkat, sitting him down as my friend pulls in Terezi. We unblindfold the two. They are shocked. They comment on each others' horns awkwardly. Karkat knew in all honesty we'd do this on purpose. He pulled out a pair of pants. "REMEMBER PANTS TEREZI?" he says. She gives a slight smile. "YOU USED TO LOVE PANTS!" He says. They both smile and the date goes on.

I am from..

I am from a family,
That dislikes my music making me feel like a flower left-for-dead on a window cell.
I am from a household,
Where no other member is welcome.
I am from a place with a long list of rules,
Where rebellion is punishable like I'm some sort of criminal.
I am from inside four walls, 
That echo with the screams of my parents.
I am doomed to a lifetime,
Of breakfast for dinner.
Doomed with a "try-too-hard" fatherly figure,
Skipping over my dreams like rocks skipping over the water in a place from my childhood.
But on the other side...

I am from a family,
That loves equally.
I am from a household,
Where we all get along for the most part.
I am from a place with a long list of rules,
All meant to be broken together.
I am from inside four walls,
That echo with the laughter of people.
And I am rewarded with a lifetime spent with caring people.
Rewarded with a "try-to-hard" fatherly figure, 
On the other side.

If you lived 2000 years back, would you rather own a dozen chicken, a horse, or a cow?

If I'd lived 2,000 years back, I'd rather own a dozen chicken. I wouldn't pick the horse because you can't really get any survival needs from the horse. I can't really eat the horse because that would most likely be really disgusting, and I'd probably imagine myself eating a character from My Little Pony, which I wouldn't be able to do.

I wouldn't pick the cow because the cons outweigh the pros. Sure, I can get milk from the cow and meat from the cow. If you really think about it though, once the cow is gone, you're going hungry again. I only had one cow since the beginning so it's not like I could repopulate them because that takes two cows.

I picked the chickens because in a dozen chickens, I'd most likely end up with at least one female to repopulate them. After repopulating them a few times, I'd have lots. I would have dozens of eggs a day, and whenever I need meat, I could slaughter a chicken or two and cook it for dinner over a fire. Eventually, I'll have enough chickens to trade some for a horse or cow others might have picked over the chickens, such as some of my classmates. Finally, I'd be able to build up my own herd of farm animals and I'd have fresh meat anytime, milk, and eggs. A dozen chickens is clearly the right choice in this situation.

PIÑATA

I am a piñata, or at least that's what they call me. Apparently, I resemble an animal these humans adore. I sit in the store waiting to see what life brings me ahead. After a few hours, a woman picks me up and takes me home with her. On the couch, she sets me in her lap and rips a whole in my stomach, stuffing me with candy. After I am full, I hurt all over. Was this a new torture method my family hadn't told me of. I'm now full of Reese's, kitkats, Butterfingers, and even lollipops. Next, they rap a string around my body, and hang me from the tree in the yard. Hours pass and my ribs are torn. Suddenly, a dozen screaming kids run into the backyard. I couldn't move and I was scared now more than ever. They ran toward me with a baseball bat. I burst open as they strike my back and all my guts spill out in the grass. They take it and eat it like savages. After, they take what remains of me into the house. Before I finally left, in my last seconds of life, I saw myself fall into the trash can. I fall lifeless. They leave me in anguish. They had no use for me anymore. 

Knight

I would choose to be a knight, rather than a viking, for the rest of my life. I'd rathrr be a knight because they have nice swords, and the shiniest armor. Throughout my lifetime, I'd get to slay hundreds of dragons. I think I'd enjoy being a knight because I'd get to fight fictional creatures and it'd feel as if I were a female knight in a fairytale. The kingdom would rely on me and I'd protect them with fortitude.

In the fairytales, a knight usually saves a prince or princess. That would mean I get to save a prince from a dragon, so I'd get to meet a prince. The kingdom would love me for saving their beloved prince, and he'd most likely crown me as his queen. Then, I'd be a queen and a knight. Inside I'd wear ball gowns,  and outside I'd wear my silver armor and ride a Pegasis named Meredith.